What guys are thinking

Cheryl is in the backyard with the two teenagers collecting the fall leaves and putting them in tall brown bags. Cheryl is using a leaf blower that also sucks them up into an attached sack. Joe is looking out from the sliding glass door thinking to himself “that thing is useless”. The teenagers, Cheryl and Joes kids, are using rakes while bickering with each other (Joe Jr. and Amber) at the same time Cheryl bickers with both. “Shut up”, “no you shut up”, “both of you shut up’, that kind of thing.

The day before Cheryl and Joe were at the hardware store shopping for kitchen cabinet door knobs because Cheryl wants ones that are more ornate. In Joe’s mind this is silly, “who cares what the handles look like” also “another project for me to do”. They settle on the type and look of the new handles which was easier than Joe anticipated and collect the amount they need which are individually rapped in plastic in a draw tray . They need 18 but the store has 16. “Go ask the guy if they have some in the back” Cheryl orders which Joe does and thinks “nothing is f---en easy” and then “why can‘t she do it?” It would’ve been better, in Joe’s mind, if they went to the big warehouse store, but Angelo’s hardware, according to Cheryl has much better selection when it comes to aesthetic hardware “like she f--en knows” is Joe’s thought.

Joe comes back and Cheryl is looking at a display of gardening power tools. One item in particular is the blower/vacuum with attached bag. It’s made of black plastic with an orange trigger. “Crap” in Joe thinks. “This is really cool” Cheryl says “and really light, hold this” Joe takes it “yea it is light”. “It beats raking, we could blow it in piles and then vacuum it up and put it into those bags you hate.” This is a point of contention with Joe. Their backyard ends at a wooded area and every year Joe would rake the leaves onto a blue tarp and drag it into the woods. Cheryl thinks it’s easier to put the leaves into bags and this causes a small argument especially when Cheryl the year before brought a stack of bags “on sale” and Joe didn’t bother using them. “Still fixated with those stupid bags” is Joe’s internal reaction but he doesn’t want to rehash the argument but he does say “what do you mean ‘we’ I’m the guy that does all the work”. “That’s okay with this I can do it all by myself while you replace the knobs” Cheryl says. “Lets see how long that lasts, ten minutes into the thing you’ll see how useless this fancy tool is and I’ll have to finish it after I install these dumb white knobs with flowers on them” is what Joe could only think of saying but dare dare dare not say. “I don’t think this has enough power” Joe does say to which Cheryl retorts “Oh right, like you need a lot of power to blow a leaf, besides it’s electric.”

“What’s that got to do with it?” Joe asks which puts an agitated look on Cheryl’s face. “Never mind, when you’re done with the cabinets you could do the leaves yourself and break your back dragging them in the woods.” Thinking fast Joe says “Well, what do I know, they sell it and people do buy it, how bad could it be?”

Now Joe is done installing the new knobs and he’s watching Cheryl vacuum a pile of leaves while the two teens are puttsing around with a rake. As Joe thought the cool new tool takes more time and effort than it’s worth, too underpowered. When not vacuuming the leaves Cheryl blows them forward and in the air attempting to coral them into a pile, the teens with the rakes are more effective. But Cheryl looks proud and industrious to which Joe feels “thinking that it’s better is every bit as good as it being, even if it isn’t, what’s the difference.” He then smiles.

It’s evening. Dinner was made and eaten. Teens are upstairs on their computers and phones and Joe is watching television. A news magazine program was on and it detailed a story where a wife was having an affair with a prosecutor and they conspired to put the husband in prison with an elaborate scheme. Joe thought to himself “how could you do such a thing?” and “what goes on in people’s minds?”.

Cheryl joins him on the couch, her head on his shoulder, hand on his chest. His arm around her. “I’m beat” she says. “You should be, that useless toy you were using made more work than you thought” no, he didn’t say this, of course, but he did say “that thing worked pretty good after all.”.
“Didn’t it, and you thought it wouldn’t smarty.”
“You were right”
“Of course I was right, I’m always right.”
Joe thought, what a good kid. “You’re a good kid” he says. Then they kissed.